Funny Whatsapp Status in English

Quit your job, buy a ticket, get a train, fall in love and never return.

Bitch is just a term used for girl who refuses dog's proposal. :P

Behind every successful man... There is a confused woman.

When people don't laugh at my jokes I just assume that they're not up to my level of comedy.

Please GOD if you can't make me slim, make my friends fat.

One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.

I took an IQ test and the results were negative.

I only need 3 things in life: Food, Wifi, Sleep :)

HEY YOU, yeah I'm talking to you, why the hell are you reading my status?

You can fool some of the people all the time, and those are the ones you want to concentrate on.

When I'm on my death bed, I want my final words to be "I left one million dollars in the...

Girls use photoshop to look beautiful.. Boys use photoshop to show their creativity.

Dear Lord, all I ask for a chance to prove that winning the lottery won't make a bad person.

It's funny how people judge other's mistakes while they also do the same thing.

Girls, if he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs. send him to KFC.

At least mosquito's are attracted to me.

I'm Jealous Of My Parents... I'll Never Have A Kid As Cool As Theirs!

It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens. – Woody Allen

Mosquitos are like family. Annoying but they carry your blood.

For all the girls that say ..... All guys are the same ...... Who told you to try them ALL.